I don’t know if most women do this, but I definitely do. So, I’d like to apologise before hand for generalising if that’s the case…..Let me just point out that the below is mainly about me and my experiences.
Why are we so hard on ourselves? Women are constantly comparing themselves to everyone else. It’s every single day! I know this sounds terrible, but I sometimes find myself giving other girls a dirty look just because they’re beautiful. It’s not fair, but I always find myself thinking…..
“Oh, she’s got nicer legs/boobs/hair/face/ass (keep inserting appropriate body parts here)…”
Then all logic goes straight out of the window! It’s all downhill from there……”That’s what men really want! Not poor little old me. Then why bother being with me, if you’d rather have the smoking hottie with legs up to her rather perky breasts?!?”
Many can argue that women and logic don’t really go together in the first place, but that’s a whole different discussion 🙂 My point is that I’ve unwittingly put words or wishes in my poor boyfriend’s mouth that were never there to begin with. Then I go home and give him and earful about something that he didn’t say or do. Unfair to say the least. Why do this to ourselves (and our better halves)??
Or perhaps some would be more familiar with the following differences between a man and a woman’s hearing….
Woman: “Honey, do you know where I left my coat?”
Man: “You look fine!”
WOMEN (you’re watching TV)
Man: “She’s got nice hair.”
Woman: “Oh really! Well, she has professionals who do her hair you know! If I had money my hair could look the same. But it’s fine. I know you’d rather have her as a girlfriend anyway. So why don’t you and Miss Wonderful Hair run off into the sunset and make little perfect haired babies together!!”
Man: **Silence** “What the hell just happened?”
So, why do we turn even the tiniest comment into something that was never there at all? All we’re doing is reinforcing this negative perception of ourselves and also appearing crazed to the ones we love. So why are the things we hear so different?
Are we really that self-conscious that we can’t appreciate ourselves the way we are? I know I am. I have horrible self-esteem issues which always spills over into my relationship and friendships. People are always telling me that I should just accept myself and be happy with who I am, but it’s so much easier said than done. I would love a 12 step programme if anyone knows of one!
I’m not sure what I’m trying to say here today, but it’s just something I’ve been thinking about. Perhaps I should try to write about something I like about myself…learn to love something about me.
But where/how do I start? Any suggestions would be appreciated! 🙂
Have a nice day folks xxx