It’s been a bit of a strange week. It started off great! I spent the weekend at the gym and got loads of exercise, I’ve been eating really well and feeling better for it. Everything seemed really positive…..then came Wednesday morning.
A bit of background information: I bought two new jumpers to add some colour to my life. One peach and the other a bright yellow – and I never wear yellow. Now, female rules state that you HAVE to wear a new purchase the following day, so I planned my outfit for the next morning. I was so excited to wear that yellow jumper! Well, things turned pretty bad, pretty quick….
I woke up in such a good mood and started getting dressed, only to discover that my beautiful new jumper made me look like even bigger and more horrible than I ever imagined. So, I just had your average early morning meltdown. The usual slamming of things, shouting at my boyfriend for no good reason, throwing things around and culminating in me storming out of the house with steam coming from my ears. You know…..as you do.
I got to work and just felt horrible. I know it’s all so unrealistic of me, but I really thought I’d fit into that jumper. It wasn’t even a smaller size than what I normally wear, but I just felt so dispirited. I’ve been working so hard, and I’m just not seeing any physical results. It took a team of 3 of my work buddies to calm me down and make me realise that I really am making headway. I feel so much better, I have more energy and on the bright side, my jeans seem a teeny tiny bit loose. So it’s not all doom and gloom! But however hard they tried, I just couldn’t snap out of it. I felt miserable. When I got home, I had a beautiful bunch of flowers waiting for me and did the only thing I could think of. I burst into tears, and tried to explain how I felt to my clearly amused/worried boyfriend through massive snobs. I’m still not sure if he really understood what I was saying, but I felt better after a good cry, and he’s seen it all before!
I’m still just trying to wrap my head around the time frame of what I’m trying to achieve. I can’t expect things to happen quickly and to see major changes so soon. These things take time and I’ve just got to be patient. Patient and consistent. This is where my biggest challenge comes in…..willpower. Normally this is the point where I feel that I’ve been working really hard and not seeing any results, I just throw in the towel. I’ve got to just put my head down and soldier through!
Bring on next week.