A little over a year ago, I started this blog. It was both terrifying and exciting at the same time and it was also one of the best things I’ve ever done. I look back at how I was feeling at the time when I started this blog and I feel so different one year on…..
About this time last year, I wrote my first ever blog entry titled “Sending this into the void….”. It was written full of hope and trepidation for the journey that I was about to start. Trust me, it’s a very scary feeling sharing your most intimate and self-conscious thoughts with the www! I was terrified of the reaction I would get, but it seemed that I had nothing to be afraid of. You were all so supportive and understanding which made writing this blog so much easier. I don’t think I’d ever be able to properly convey my gratitude for that, but I want everyone reading this to know how much every click or comment means to me!
lynne2thin started with the following slogan….“365 days to a healthier, happier me” and I can honestly say that a year later, at least part of that is true. I had a wish for my 28th birthday, which was to go out dancing in a polka dot dress (hopefully a size 10 polka dot dress). Well, I didn’t have the dress this year, but I sure as hell went dancing…..twice!
I wanted to include a few photos of me one year ago…….I think what strikes me the most is although I’m smiling in these photos, you can see how uncomfortable and self-conscious I am.
This was me at my biggest.....Just over a Year Ago!
Me and a friend at my birthday party last year....2010!
With another friend on my birthday....2010!
Here are a few pics of me on my birthday this year…….What I love about it, is that you can really see that I’m more at ease with myself. Two friends took me out shopping for a new top to wear to my birthday party, so I felt really great, and it shows! 🙂
My Birthday...2011! (And my awesome Hello Kitty gift bag)
Some of the dancing I was talking about....I didn't say it was pretty! 😉
With the girls at my 1st Birthday Party this year.....I celebrated a lot! 🙂
Although I haven’t exactly achieved all I wanted to this past year and I haven’t exactly reached my target weight, I wanted to share a few things with you that I have achieved…..
- I smile/talk more. I know this sounds ridiculous and like something that everyone does, but that wasn’t the case with me. I’ve become more outgoing and am much more comfortable talking to everyone and anyone. I’ve also learned that a smile goes a long way, so I’m flashing my pearly whites as often as I can!
- I’m more confident. In this regard, I do still have some way to go, but I’m feeling more comfortable with myself and in turn it affects my confidence. When I walk down the street, I can hold my head up high and it helps. Even this little bit of extra confidence I have, has had such an effect on my day-to-day life!
- I’m starting to learn how to let go of the small things. This is still a work in progress, but I’m slowly but surely getting the hang of it. The things I think people judge me on, are in reality the things nobody cares about. It’s just my own self-consciousness speaking and making me feel insecure. Trying to let go of these little insecurities and every day issues is extremely liberating. It allows me to just be me, so take it or leave it!
- Giving less thought to what others think about me. This is still something I struggle with every day and is sometimes much harder than other times. I’m a “pleaser”….meaning I want people to like me all the time. So, I constantly worry about what everyone thinks about me! Greg once gave me the following advice: “You are only in charge of your own actions, not those of others”. So, if I’m happy with the way I live my life, who cares what anyone else thinks?
- Being more positive. This one I also struggle with a bit, but there really is something to be said for the power of positive thinking. I’ve found that if I tackle my day with a more positive attitude, I get more positivity out of the universe and I end up having a great day. Although some days are harder than others…
- Getting healthier. The process is taking a little longer than I thought and it still doesn’t always come easy, but I’m getting there. In January, I couldn’t run for more than 3 minutes without having to walk. Now, I can easily run continuously for 45 minutes and I enjoy it! Something I never thought possible. I’m also making healthier food choices, but I do still pig out occasionally 🙂 In addition, I’ve joined Weight Watchers which has given me extra incentive to lose the pounds!
- My relationship has improved. Let me just start by saying that Greg and I have never had a bad relationship, but my craziness and insane insecurities have, at times, put a strain on things. I’ve sometimes put words and thoughts in his mouth when they weren’t there, and that’s very unfair of me. The bottom line is, Greg is with me because he loves the person I am, not what I look like. If that was the case, I think he’d have left a while ago and I’d also never allow myself to be with someone who is that shallow.
- I’m happier. That’s one of the true parts of my slogan….“365 days to a healthier, happier me”. Overall, I’ve become a more chilled out person. I’m trying to take one day at a time and be happy doing it. So far it’s kinda working! 🙂
Well, that’s what I wanted to share with you all today. So although I didn’t end up wearing the polka dot dress I wanted to on my birthday, I’ve already come such a long way and I’m happy with that.
I’ve still got some way to go, so please stick around for another year (at least….Hehehee!). I’ll keep blogging, so I really hope you all keep reading…..